Friday, August 04, 2006

Waiting for Godot

"For a long time it seemed to me that real life was about to begin, but there was always some obstacle in the way. Something had to be got through first, some unfinished business; time still to be served, a debt to be paid. Then life would begin. At last it dawned on me that these obstacles were my life." -Bette Howland

I recently had a morose conversation with a friend who had lost most of what he'd known up until that point. Things went awry. He almost lost his mind. He felt that he was on a dark path yet one worth wading through. He admitted that the humiliation and degradation of it all was horrible. If anything, it convinced him that there was evil in the world. Of course, part of him always understood that. After all, in science, there is positive and negative energy. The two forms rarely, if ever, differ in degree. Otherwise the universe would implode.

We would like to think that we are living life to the fullest, not holding back, but do we waste time waiting for something that has already begun, without our notice?

Everyone has a dream that they are holding onto, whether it is to change the course of humankind, build a home, be the first person to travel outside of our galaxy or simply have a quiet moment of rest.

I think it's important to value the challenges that prevent us from achieving our ideal. It seems that in life, once one challenge is overcome, the next one is even more difficult, and there are no breaks. Does that mean that life just gets worse? Perhaps it is simply the certainty of getting older.

In sleep we unwind what we prepare in our minds during waking life. In life we work ourselves silly, measuring the length of some imaginary threshold that we anticipate breaking through. Hopefully, before there is no feeling at all, it will not feel like we've spent too much time waiting. Hopefully, once life is spent, there will be more stories shooting out of it, like spokes in a wheel or rays from a star, that will allow for the details to be told, for truths to be gleaned, in more ways than can be said in one life time.

"...for life's not a paragraph And death i think is no parenthesis" -E. E. Cummins



Blogger Manic Street Preacher said...

the god preached once...
did u have a good life when you died? enough to base a movie on?
of course even in quoting jim morrison i can remember about kafka's the trial whr k. never really gets to the palace.
its absyrd isnt it? this is a very post 1st world war syndrome,....very camus like...ya know. to wonder about this. this very thing.
preacher dropped by in ref to promod bafna's blog. preacher knowz bout faulkner's link to shakespeare's line life's a tale told by an idiot full of sound and fury

she just din know aneone else will too.

very dark blog u got in here. do u hide behind it like i do behind mine?
this has been a very dark experience.

7:34 a.m.  
Blogger blow said...

our lives are accidental... and accidents can't be pre-empted.
a disappearing trail perhaps? nevertheless.. mind if i hang around for a bit? intriguing place...

5:00 p.m.  
Blogger Manic Street Preacher said...

hide behind ur dark blog by all means.
preacher herself aint comin outta hers.
not yet.
but she does have to ask a pertinent question...
would u mind too much if she links urs dark blog of mellow preachings that she personally calls DEAD POETS' SOCIETY?
hope not.


1:29 a.m.  
Blogger sirbarrett said...

manic street preacher -That's interesting. I'd never heard that Jim Morrison quote. Also, I must apologize for misquoting Shakespeare on promod bafna. He deserves it properly. Coincidentally, I read the true quote after writing this post because it is also very speculative of life's value. Here it is, from Macbeth. Let's see if I remember it correctly this time:

"Tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow, creeps in this petty pace from day to day to the last syllable of recorded time. And all our yesterdays have lighted fools the way to dusty death. Out! Out brief candle! Life is but a walking shadow, a poor player who frets and struts his hour upon the stage and is heard no more. Tis a tale, told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing."

It just fills you with cheer doesn't it?

I'd love to be linked to Dead Poet's Society, as long as I don't have to be dead to fit in. Peace be with you, oh mysterious one.

blow -I like visiting you. By all means, come here once in awhile.

3:08 a.m.  
Blogger Manic Street Preacher said...

oh don u be dead to be on muh blog. u've gotta be very much alive. and ok. and bloggin!!:)
linked you.
the thing is..that quote doesn fill me wid cheer u know why? it is sed by macbeth himself when he's at his last wits. when he knows he's to die. when all the whitches' prophecy have come true.
sad. but mad macbeth was a wonder.
and hope u update soon.

5:06 a.m.  
Blogger mistipurple said...

i'm living my life like that of 'waiting for Godot'
what a waste.
the spirit is willing but oh the flesh, the flesh..

8:29 a.m.  
Blogger Chocolate Monkey said...

I want to live my life in the present, but unfortunately at the moment most of it is being lived out in the Future. I've only just stopped living it in the Past. It's like that annoyung motorway exit that you keep missing. Then again, what the hell would I know, I've never had a car.

4:24 p.m.  
Anonymous Adorable Girlfriend said...

I just live. That's what I do.


4:37 p.m.  
Blogger Percival said...

My theory is that it ultimately turns out that the significance of our lives was in moving objects from one location to another: bringing the dishes to the sink, shuffling paperwork, getting up for a kleenex, taking out the garbage...

6:20 p.m.  
Blogger Enemy of the Republic said...

Has anyone ever told you that you are a great writer? Wow. I want to spend time here. The paragraph on sleep rings so true: we need those nightmares to remain functional in this silly world. But what happens when the same dream keeps reappearing? What isn't going right in your life?

With your permission, I will link you to my blog.

10:57 p.m.  

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