Sunday, May 07, 2006

Cleaning Episode

There is no mold that grows between the corners of my room.
We are far from that.
The dust that gathers on table tops will kill no one
as far as I know.
I like to think of myself as a tidy person.
Was there even a question?

Of course I am not the ghastly appearance of water stains on my shower wall,
nor the errant hairs that accumulate at the bottom of the drain.
It's only human!
Perhaps it has been a little while but I have a solution to the grime.
Nothing a cloth, chemicals, towels, mops, a brushes and few strong strokes can't take care of.

Surely, I don't need any windex to see that my toilet could use a scrub,
or that my counter top could use a new shine.
(I might though, need a helpful, paternal or maternal reminder)
Cleaning is a chore which enlightens the spirit and clears the surface of my desk!
It doesn't take a Betty Crocker to tell me that.
It is a way of organizing items, particles and particulars.

With toxic chemicals, I can sanitize, sterilize and standardize my spaces, spraying relentlessly until all bacteria are annihilated.
I can vacuum floors, de-scent and rotate laundry through a purifying cycle, softening and drying the Dickens out of it.

My parents apparently are not aware of this secret ritual I perform.
Cleaning, they think, is out of character for me.
Have things really gone so far towards the unkempt?

My father pops his head mischievously downstairs.
"Are you alright?" he asks, in mock earnestness.
"Yes. Why?"
"Well, it smells like cleaning supplies!"

"AND WHY SHOULDN'T IT!!"

Filed under Poetry and Play

8 Comments:

Blogger Jason said...

I LOATHE cleaning the bathroom.

11:49 a.m.  
Blogger Pincushion said...

lol! This made me wonder..what my lil kiddo is going to be like?!!
His room stinks!
Cheers!
:))

1:31 p.m.  
Blogger The Imaginary Diva said...

I'll make sure to keep you in mind when I am looking for a roommate..... It's so hard to find a man who's neat and tidy. Just dont tell my boyfriend I said that okay :)

9:08 p.m.  
Blogger {illyria} said...

that was an awesome rollercoaster ride, wasn't it? my stomach settles with broom and feather duster in hand.

10:16 p.m.  
Blogger x said...

you are a dirty old man Barrier.
and you don't need chemicals to clean the house. Tsk!

2:44 a.m.  
Blogger Prmod Bafna said...

heh! nicely written :)

1:31 p.m.  
Blogger sirbarrett said...

maddy -Thanks. I take having many styles as a compliment.

jimmy -Cleaning up some of the grossest things including grease, clogged pipes and hair has killed my gag reflex, otherwise I'd be with you. (I do enjoy the strong smell of chemicals afterwards though)

pincushion -I think that kids have to get really dirty to get it out of their systems. I'm sure your son will take cleanliness very seriously.

sharon -...but that's why you chose your boyfriend right? cause he was one in a million? A Mr.Clean? If you give me a discount on rent we'll cut a deal.

transience -So cleaning makes you feel serene inside?

chloe -Too bad you weren't here or you'd give me a lesson in organic bathroom maintenance eh Chloƫnheizen? What do you do, squeeze fresh orange rinds to give it that natural scent?

prmod bafna -Perhaps it looks neater in writing than it does in my bathroom but they are close enough to be competitive.

6:24 p.m.  
Blogger The Imaginary Diva said...

You wont believe it. I actually went and scrubbed my showers... Just reading your post got me in the mood. Thought about you the whole time.

11:31 p.m.  

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