Friday, February 10, 2006

Valentinian Lesson #3: Thinking Too Much

What is our largest sexual organ? Before you answer "my johnson" consider your brain. Brains do strange things when they are in lust, nevermind love.

In contrast to Valentinian lesson #2, that suggested love comes from sight, this article suggests love can dampen certain senses of judgement, and make us blind. Unrequited love can result in symptoms of mania, depression, obsessive compulsive disorder or even suicide. This article suggests it is a instictual urge that needs satisfying. Learning to love is a process of learning how to articulate our feelings and find someone who understands us. Maslow's needs includes love and a 'sense of belonging.'

Love releases endorphins in the brain that can become addictive, forcing people into a situation of dependency where they cannot kick their love habit. Recently, an example of this was depicted in this year's controversial movie Brokeback Mountain when Jack Twist says "I wish I knew how to quit you."

Love has a way of making you think the person you're loving is more important than anything else -to the point where you'll fantasize and ignore reality. This is in line with the Petrarchan tradition of idolizing the object of love and demeaning oneself in comparison. Astrophel and Stella by Phillip Sidney is a good example. On that note, I've delved back into the archives of my personal journal to a time when I was either in love, hormonal, or madly insane, to bring you:

Thinking Too Much

I think and I
think and I
think and I
think and I
think about you.

The thought of you softly grazes my head.
It's like a light fairy,
yielding a machete.

The thought of you is funny:
It changes.

Then, I think about that,
and I wonder: should I be thinking?

Then this brings me to my next point:
What if I could just STOP!

The thought of you worms itself into my brain,
then it works itself into an anxious structure.

Tension builds...
then suddenly!
-or puncture me with a steroid needle of noxious substance.

I can't see clearly.
My own worries take over my mental infrastructure.

I long. long. long. for this and that,
decorating the waiting room of my heart
with outdated memorabilia.

I'm taking aggressive means
of addressing my confusion
with those who have deprived me
of my intelligence,
but now I am my only victim.

People like you take all I have, just in thinking.

@ 2005 sirbarrett


Blogger Chloe said...

your poem is wonderful.
but the truth is, love sucks.

3:45 p.m.  
Blogger Lorena said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

4:25 p.m.  
Blogger Lorena said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

4:26 p.m.  
Blogger Lorena said...

i wonder sometimes if my feelings or more so if sometimes i'm dellusional. unrequited love is the worst.

great poetry prose....
I long. long. long. for this and that,
decorating the waiting room of my heart
with outdated memorabilia.

sounds familiar to how i feel.

i love when Jack Twist says that and i can definitely relate. i do feel i'm addicted ....scary.

4:27 p.m.  
Blogger Maddy said...

"The heart has reasons,
that reason does not understand."

-Who said this? I'm not sure...

5:22 p.m.  
Blogger sirbarrett said...

chloe -Thank you. If love sucks, hate blows.

lorena -Unrequited love stings. The most fitting line I can offer is Mercutio's: "If love be rough with you, be rough with love;
Prick love for pricking, and you beat love down." -William Shakespeare. You can savour the love you have and feel blessed that you have a sense of goodwill to a person, despite their negligence. If they are worth it, sometimes the experience is enough itself. Even thinking about someone can provide new insights to yourself (although you might feel you need them for anything to be sane at all). If they are not worth it, you have to remind yourself what your love is good for. It seems we can love a person even when we feel they don't deserve it. That is what grace is like.

Maddy - Jacques Benigne Bossuel

6:16 p.m.  
Blogger Maddy said...

??? Never HEARD of him!
But that quote was floating around
in my lilting head...

8:06 p.m.  
Blogger Nabeel said...

hahahah @ lust never mind love
My philosophy teachers once told me a great thing .. Love is Blind .. WHY? because .. when in love .. you see the person in a different way that nobody else can .. and it is not the lover who's blind but everyone around him .. because they can't see what he can !

11:38 p.m.  
Blogger Maddy said...

Nabeel, THAT is breathtaking.
Perfect. Ahhh...LOVE it!

12:44 a.m.  
Blogger Adorable Girlfriend said...

Love is a wonderful thing. I enjoyed the post.

8:23 a.m.  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

For some reason, when I hear "love sucks", I just picture Adam Sandler singing "Love Stinks" in The Wedding Singer.

9:20 a.m.  
Blogger Lorena said...

thank you for that. you have a way with words! :) you are wise indeed.

1:43 p.m.  
Blogger BarbaraFromCalifornia said...

What a beautiful writer you are, S.B.

I know what it means to think too much. Just look at the title of my blog.

Happy Valentine's Day to you....

3:08 p.m.  
Blogger Maddy said...

Hi Barrett! I LOVE your cd!
You have a magnificent, soulful,
resonant voice - I wrote about
you in my blog today!

Thankyou - you are a sweetheart.

Smooch, smooch, hugs,
hand clapping - lots of smiling...

3:22 p.m.  
Blogger 1 said...

that was "lovely"...i can still feel that pain in my stomach.

11:41 p.m.  
Blogger EATING POETRY said...

Woe, I love the repetition in the poem.

Yes, interesting, both of doing public relations and poetry... must be the writer thing, or the fact that I'm almost a cancer on the cusp, so hey. I also noticed the Dostoyevsky thing; love him.

6:01 p.m.  

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